Darul Iftaa Mahmudiyyah

How should tarbiyyah between sons and daughters differ, especially when they are naughty?

· 27 Jumada I 1421 AH1 min readFatwa 318English

Question

My daughters are 3 and 5 and my son is 1 yrs old.My mother recomends that you should never shout or hit your daughters. However on the rare occasion that I have hit them when they're extremely naughty then they have refrained from that particular naughty act in the future.My wife usually says that she should be the sole punisher however I believe that my contribution every so often greatly improves their tarbiyyah

Answer

When children are naughty and the only solution to reform them is hitting them, parents should not hit them in the state of anger as the intention of hitting them may be to cool off their anger.

Such an intention will defeat the purpose of hitting, being reformation. It is suggested that parents in the state of anger exercise tolerance by containing their anger until it subsides. Thereafter, create an impression of anger and hit the child. Hitting the child with the proper intention will realise the desired effect.

And Allah Taãla Knows Best.

Was salaam

Mufti Ebrahim Desai

Answered by
Mufti Ebrahim Desai
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Source: Darul Iftaa Mahmudiyyah — https://askimam.org/public/question_detail/318
Fatawa SA: https://fatawa.co.za/fatwa/askimam-318

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