Breaking the engagement due to fiancé having an intimate conversation with another woman.

· 17 Dhuʻl-Qiʻdah 1440 AH2 min readFatwa 42833English

Question

السلام عليكم و رحمة الله و بركاته

I am an Aalimah, graduated just months back Alhamdulillah. I have been engaged for about 3 years now after an istekhara. I recently came across an exchange of an intimate conversation between my fiance and a woman. I did not intend to spy or stalk but just happened to come across it. More than often did I try to drive the thoughts away but my insecurity increases with each passing day. According to people it is norm for a man to exchange words like that with a woman. But its absolutely wrong according to me and not acceptable.Deen, Loyalty, honesty, family life, kindness, togetherness, unity of the family are important aspects for me. I see loyalty lacking, in the world of fitnas where the engagement for an undefined reason is being prolonged, it is very tempting for a man to fall into traps of Shaytan.

Is it okay to break the engagement after an istekhara again for my heart is not at ease and I can never gain trust back. Which is absolutely unhealthy.

Looking for a prompt response

جزاكم الله خيرا

Answer

In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.

As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.

Sister in Islam,

It is pleasing to know that you are an Aalimah. You should know that there is no place in Sharīʿah for the concept of fiancé and fiancée. The man you are proposed to is a total stranger to you. How did you just happen to come across information of a stranger?

Nevertheless, if what you state is true, then you should discuss your concerns with the seniors of your family and seek their wise counsel on the way forward. They may also seek clarity from the boy on the allegation. If you are still in doubt, then exercise precaution and make istikhārah again. You should not proceed with the marriage whilst you have a genuine reservation about the person.

And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best

Usaamah Dadipatel.

Student - Darul Iftaa

Eshowe, KZN, South Africa.

Checked and Approved by,

Mufti Ebrahim Desai.

15-11-1440| 18-07-2019

Answered by
Eshowe, KZN, South Africa
Checked & approved by
Mufti Ebrahim Desai
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