I am a 19/f thinking of not getting married because I do not favor overly sexual marriages unlike many men. I would prefer intercourse to be restricted mostly to procreation. Afraid to die alone.

Question

My decision is one that has been taken seriously and after quite some deliberation. My ideal physical intimacy includes kissing and caressing but not sex unless greatly limited. I have also come to value my chastity a great deal and hesitant of losing it. My only fear is of dying and living safely alone and opinion of family but otherwise I am very comfortable with the idea. Even if I do decide to, I want to do it when I am ready and not because of family (parents want me to get married at 24) or other pressures.

Mufti Ebrahim Desai · Accepted Answer

Nabi (Sallallaahu Alayhi Wasallam) has mentioned in a Hadith: "O group of Youth! Whoever from you possess the means to maintain a wife then he should marry."

Our Beloved Nabi (Sallallaahu Alayhi Wasallam) has also stated that he who turns away from his sunnat is not from his group. From the above two Ahadith we learn that to marry and have off-spring is a sunnat and has also been encouraged in our Shariat. Allah Ta'ala mentions in the Holy Quraan: "And from the signs of Allah is that He has created for you from your own type partners so that you may find peace in them and He has created love between you."

If a person has confidence that he will not fall into sin if he does not marry then it will not be necessary for him to marry immediately but if there is a great danger of him falling into sin as is the condition now-a-days then it will be necessary for him to marry and save himself from the different avenues of sin.

Nabi (Sallallaahu Alayhi Wasallam) has also encouraged us to marry women who are fertile and child bearing. One should also remember that intercourse before marriage is forbidden and a major sin.

and Allah Ta'ala Knows Best

Mufti Ebrahim Desai

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